What if people knew how to “read” people better when on Facebook, Twitter or other social media sites? Wouldn’t it help them to increase their business and their productivity and ultimately, not only increase their cash flow, but also improve their personal and business relationships? So how does one learn the art of people reading? First before I tell you how, my PeopleSmart World business partner and dear friend Carol Dysart happened to mention to me about this guy she saw on the news one night on TV. This guy had worked as a flight attendant for 20 years and had lost his cool with a surly passenger, who got up before he was supposed to. The grumpy passenger hit the attendant on the head who was trying to prevent him from pulling down his luggage, in getting ready to exit the plane!
The attendant got so mad that he shouted a rather not so nice word, grabbed a beer from the galley, opened the emergency door, deployed the chute, and then out he jumped! He slid down and off that airplane before anyone knew what had happened! When Carol told me how she could read what she saw from his behaviour and that she predicted why it had happened, it just fascinated me and I asked her to tell me more. Carol said, “Here’s what I got…When I looked at him, I read his style as somebody who was what we call a High C – or someone who puts most of their energy into doing a great job by complying to rules. Since the report said that he’d been 20 years in that field I also knew that this meant he had been dealing with all types of people for many, many years – something that is not too comfortable for people with that personal style. He had to have had some social interest, but what I could observe was that he didn’t have an open, smiling face. He displayed a furrowed brow and a scowl. I was guessing at his “C-ness” which is compliance to rules, and that he was a cautious style. Because he had blown up at the customer showed me that he was also at the end of his patience. Carol has always been intrigued about the fact that the DISC model is something that you can use anywhere, because it’s about observable behaviour. The man that invented the system called DISC, Dr. William Marston in the 20’s said, “You can tell what motivates a person if you can observe their presenting style.” But just to finish the attendant’s story, part of his style is that he’s a High C – the Compliant, cautious type of style, and he holds things in. He doesn’t like to share personally, he’s very efficient, probably he does his job extraordinarily well, and yet when things bubble away too long and are held in, yep that’s right, he exploded! That was what happened. He just exploded for no reason, supposedly, in the moment. But who knows what was going on in his personal life before that? It was just a quick observation. The art to “people reading” is to look and watch somebody, and ask a few questions. When someone asks you to join their networks or be their friend on Facebook, do you read their personal profile? If I’m on Facebook I can start to see who a person is in their profile just by the kind of words they use. In the past it used to be how you looked on paper for example on your resume, the credit report, or in the newspaper, all those things. But now it’s more about how you look online. For those reading this that know nothing about the four DISC personality styles, here is a snapshot. DISC is an acronym for the following words, “D” stands for dominance, “I” stands for influence, “S” stands for steadiness, and “C” stands for compliance. D and I people are both outgoing and direct, and they’re more proactive. The C and the S people are the more cautious types. They’ll choose a more indirect approach. If you can imagine them at a party… the C and S will not rush into a brand new group of people and start introducing themselves. At a networking event you can spot them. They’ll be cautiously in a corner or sitting down at the table or they’ll be really grateful if you take the initiative and go and introduce yourself and introduce them around. So the question is how do you recognize the different styles on Facebook or Twitter? Let’s first talk about the outgoing and direct and indirect types of people. It’s in their faces, first of all. If they put their face right in the middle of a picture of themselves up close, you know that they have a strong and outgoing personality. These styles want you to see them and they probably have what we call strong ego strength. Now that doesn’t mean ego, like a bad thing. Ego strength means they have a strong sense of “I am,” (who they are). The S and the C styles may know who they are but they won’t tell you. They’ll let you find out about them. So the C and S photos online will be a little more reserved. They might be cautiously smiling; you can see it coming through their eyes. They’ll have, maybe, a pleasant look on their face if they like having their picture taken. Usually if you see in a picture someone that isn’t smiling looking very powerful and indirect, it’ll either be the C style or the D style. Remember in this model, the D’s and the C’s focus on the task. Again, D is dominance to problem solving, I is influence with people, S is steadiness to the task, and C is compliant to the rules. These are four very different qualities. We have all of them in our style, and we can use all of them, but we use them in different levels of intensity, depending on the situation. Because DISC is NOT a psychological model but rather a way to predict one’s needs-motivated behaviour, once we understand and can recognise, which one of the four major styles is primary for them – Dominance, Influence, Steadiness or Compliance, then our chances of accurately guessing what interests them and what things they focus on increases. The D’s and C’s are focused on task rather than on winning friends. It isn’t that they aren’t able to be friendly. It is just that other things have higher priorities - like getting the job done quickly or getting it done right! They are bottom line people whereas the I and the S are more focused on people, so that makes them more open, they smile more and are more interested in how people feel. You could say that the I and the S-style of people are into aspects of BEING-ness while the D and the C are more into DOING-ness. So look at their online profiles. You can start to look for clues in what they say or promote. They are giving out clues if you know where to look. What types of things do they report doing? What are they proud of? Are they talking more about things of a bottom line or technical nature? Or is it more about people or teams or ways people like being supported? Start being open to what DISC is really saying about you and know that your style is walking through the door with you (it’s nothing you can hide)! People go, “Oh I don’t want to have people see my profile” and I go, “Why not? You see, they already know it the moment you come through the door or post online!” Here's to your success in all relationships! Carol and Sandra P.S. For those of you that would like to complete a DISC assessment for learning what DISC style you are click here
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 It just occurred to us that you might be interested in knowing why we have committed so much time in our careers to encouraging people to “know themselves” by starting that inquiry with a DISC Assessment.
(Hint: It's probably NOT what you expect!) Well, here’s the answer… Over and over again while talking to business owners and students who have NOT taken their own DISC assessment, it is clear to us that they have no clue of the gift that they are! We often ask them to describe themselves, what they need, what motivates them, and how they like being communicated with. And they can’t! And it matters so much – IF they want a high quality of life and great relationships with others. They do tell us that this is important to them, but they don’t see the connection! So we wonder, Why is it so hard to get their attention? Why do those who know about it put it on the ‘back burner’ so to speak and think they will get around to doing it ‘someday’? The biggest reason we think is that they are a little afraid it might tell something about them that they have spent their whole life trying to “hide” from others. And why is this? Because the people who have been giving them any type of negative feedback throughout their lives are usually those people who are well-meaning and think it is their job to correct or to improve them – like parents, siblings, teachers, etc. But we find that those are usually people whose personality style is completely opposite to the one they are ‘lovingly giving feedback to’ – (I.e. Correcting’!) Is that your situation? Have you ever felt criticized for being just the way you are by someone who you don’t see eye to eye with all the time anyway? Of course! It is natural! All human beings have one thing in common… they want to be “right.” (And no one likes being “wrong” so they try to prove how right they are by telling those who are different from them that they are wrong… and the cycle goes on and on and on.) Well it is just not the truth! Every single person has some personality trait that is different from the next person. And it isn’t a matter of “right” and “wrong.” In fact, while the human ego would object loudly, it is actually a GOOD THING to surround yourself with people with different points of views and perspectives. (We will leave the WHY of that to another post.) But this is the way some people think… that is, UNTIL they take their own DISC assessment! Then they see for themselves the gift of the traits and the style strengths identified in detail in their DISC assessment report! What a shock! It is totally different from what they thought it would be like! Once they see that their assessment is amazingly accurate, they suddenly want those others in their world – at home and at work – to take their own DISC assessment so that everyone can start to appreciate each other for their similarities - and their differences! I hope you can now see that this is why it is time for you to stop stalling and to go ahead and take your assessment! Click here now! You’ll LOVE learning what everyone else sees and knows about you. You’ll see why you do what you do. You’ll find out how to adapt the way you approach others who have a different style from you when you are with or at work with them. Then you’ll wonder why it took you so long to find out! You’ll know this is right for you when you feel that feeling of completeness… that BEINGNESS that grows in you when you get to look at yourself… and enjoy the view! Be the gift that you are! Carol and Sandra  Let me ask you a question... Have you ever experienced the frustration of not being able to communicate with someone? Certainly you have haven’t you? Possibly on a daily or weekly basis, right? So what do you do about it?
If you learn about the four DISC styles and what their DISC Life Focus and needs are, you will be well on the way to feeling less frustrated when it comes to the people in your life. The good news is that human beings are not all the same. The bad news is that human beings are not all the same! Whether this fact is an asset or a challenge to you depends on how ‘people-literate’ (‘DISC’-literate’) you are and whether or not you have already DISCovered your own DISC style. People all are motivated… but we cannot motivate each other. That may seem hard to get, given that businesses spend millions of dollars each year sending their people off to seminars or bringing in motivational speakers to do just that! What most people miss is the fact that each behavioral style is motivated by two basic drives – our “needs-motivation” as well as our beliefs or values. These are the needs and standards that guide each of our lives and create the differences within each of us. These guideposts determine our choices such as what clothes we buy and wear, what car we drive, where we live, who we marry, what church we attend, etc. So if motivation is “why people do what they do” and our behavior is a distinct way of thinking, feeling or acting, once we see a person’s behavior we can identify what might motivate them. And when you can identify the reasons others do what they do, you can then create an environment in which those others are more likely to be productively self-motivated. So the sooner you can learn what each style values, seeks, needs, and avoids, the easier it is to tune in and relate to them. By the way this small piece of information you have just read, is the key to eliminating some of those frustrations you feel around others! For the most part we don't intuitively know how other styles think or feel because, as human beings, we tend to reference everything against the way WE would do things and we don’t often ask questions. So, you may ask, “How can we learn more about and recognize what makes each of us unique?” The best way to know others and the personality differences that makes each one of us unique, is to start by taking your own DISC personality profile. Click here if you would like to order your unique online profile questionnaire link NOW. Even if you have taken a DISC profile somewhere else, it is a good idea to tune in on yourself with a different focus – “Me at work,” “Me at home,” “Me in my personal or business partnerships.” You are changing and growing all the time. The question is, “How?” You might even want to take our DISC certification training to really understand how people tick! Click here to learn more... We hope you will stay with it by continuing to follow our blog, read our articles, and explore all the other types of profiles that will also give you another access to personal and business mastery. This journey we are on is to understand yourself and DISCover what it means to own the Magic of YOU! Better communication and less frustration when it comes to people is only a click away. Until next time, keep that smile on your face! It beautifies the world! Carol and Sandra  There are over a billion people on Facebook and more joining each day! With the increase of interest in social media, millions of people communicate through LinkedIn, Twitter and Facebook.
This means that these people are tuned in to everything from notifying people what’s going on in their lives to just keeping up on the latest information in the industry. What if people knew how to “read” people better when on Facebook, Twitter or other social media sites? Wouldn’t it help them to increase their business and their productivity and ultimately, not only increase their cash flow, but also improve their personal and business relationships? So how does one learn this art of people reading? First before I tell you, my DISC associate and friend Carol Dysart happened to mention to me about this guy she saw on the news one night on TV. This guy had worked as a flight attendant for 20 years and had lost his cool with a surly passenger who got up before he was supposed to. The gruff passenger hit the attendant on the head who was trying to prevent him from pulling down his luggage in getting ready to exit the plane! The attendant got so mad that he shouted a rather not so nice word, grabbed a beer from the galley, opened the emergency door, deployed the chute, and then out he jumped! He slid down and off that airplane before anyone knew what had happened! When Carol told me how she could read what she saw from his behavior and that she predicted why it had happened, it just fascinated me and I asked her to tell me more. Carol said, “Here’s what I got…When I looked at him, I read his style as somebody who was what we call a High C – or someone who puts most of their energy into doing a great job by complying to rules. Since the report said that he’d been 20 years in that field I also knew that this meant he had been dealing with all types of people for many, many years – something that is not too comfortable for people with that personal style. He had to have had some social interest, but what I could observe was that he didn’t have an open, smiling face. He displayed a furrowed brow and a scowl. I was guessing at his “C-ness” which is compliance to rules, and that he was a cautious style. Because he had blown up at the customer showed me that he was also at the end of his patience. Carol has always been intrigued about the fact that the DISC model is something that you can use anywhere, because it’s about observable behavior. The man that invented the system called DISC, Dr. William Marston in the 20’s said, “You can tell what motivates a person if you can observe their presenting style.” But just to finish the attendant’s story, Carol said because he is a a High C style – the Compliant and cautious type, he holds things in. He doesn’t like to share personally, he’s very efficient, probably he does his job extraordinarily well, and yet when things bubble away too long and are held in, yep that’s right, he exploded! That was what happened. He just exploded for no reason, supposedly, in the moment. But who knows what was going on in his personal life before that? It was just a quick observation. The art to “people reading” is to look and watch somebody, and ask a few questions. When someone asks you to join their networks or be their friend do you read their personal profile? If I’m on Facebook I can start to see who a person is in their profile just by the kind of words they use. In the past it used to be how you looked on paper for example on your resume, the credit report, or in the newspaper, all those things. But now it’s more about how you look online. For those reading this post that know nothing about the four DISC personality styles, here is a snapshot. DISC is an acronym for the following words:
D and I people are both outgoing and direct, and they’re more proactive. The C and the S people are the more cautious types. They’ll choose a more indirect approach. If you can imagine them at a party… the C and S will not rush into a brand new group of people and start introducing themselves. At a networking event you can spot them. They’ll be cautiously in a corner or sitting down at the table or they’ll be really grateful if you take the initiative and go and introduce yourself and introduce them around. Recognizing a DISC style online So the question is how do you recognize the different styles on Facebook or Twitter? Let’s first talk about the outgoing and direct and indirect types of people. These people are the D and I's. It’s in their faces, first of all. If they put their face right in the middle of a picture of themselves up close, you know that they have a strong and outgoing personality. These styles want you to see them and they probably have what we call strong ego strength. Now that doesn’t mean ego, like a bad thing. Ego strength means they have a strong sense of “I am,” (who they are). The S and the C styles may know who they are but they won’t tell you. They’ll let you find out about them. So the C and S photos online will be a little more reserved. They might be cautiously smiling; you can see it coming through their eyes. They’ll have, maybe, a pleasant look on their face if they like having their picture taken. Usually if you see a picture where the person isn’t smiling or they are looking very powerful and indirect, it’ll either be the C style or the D, because if we look from using this model, the D and the C are focusing on task. Again, D is dominance, I is influence, S is steadiness to the task, and C is compliant to the rules. Those are four very different qualities and we have all of them, and we use all of them but we use them in different levels of intensity. Because DISC is NOT a psychological model but rather a way to predict one’s needs-motivated behavior, once we understand and can recognize which one of the four major styles is primary for a person – Dominance, Influence, Steadiness or Compliance, then our chances of accurately guessing what interests them and what things they focus on increases. The D’s and C’s are focused on task rather than on winning friends. It isn’t that they aren’t able to be friendly. It is just that other things have higher priorities - like getting the job done quickly or getting it done right! They are bottom line people whereas the I and the S are more focused on people, so that makes them more open, they smile more and are more interested in how people feel. You could say that the I and the S-styles of people are into aspects of being-ness while the D and the C are more into doing-ness. So look at people's profiles in their social media and the types of roles they play. You can start to look for clues in what they say or promote. They are giving out clues if you know where to look. What types of things do they report doing? What are they proud of? Are they talking more about things of a bottom line or technical nature? Or is it more about people or teams or ways people like being supported? Have some fun with people reading and let us know how you go! |
AuthorSandra is very passionate about supporting others to be the best they can be through sharing her stories and experiences she has gained along the way... Categories
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